Friday, December 17, 2010

Eavesdropping in St. Augustine

Heard Around The Plaza

"The Pope has a permanent bedroom available to him at all times here at the Cathedral that's what makes it a  Basillica." Red Train Driver

"Tomorrow, in the Plaza, the Jewish people are going to light up the Mezuzah" from a city worker.

"I don't have to pay for parking on Sunday? If I get a ticket I'm coming back to make you pay". From a way too suspicious tourist.

"They used to hang pirates from that tree" Walking tour guide spouting nonsense.

"Can I see some ID? A request from the police just before they issue a 100 dollar ticket to artist Suvo.

"I really doubt that there's 3 million lights here, it looks more like maybe, two million." Local person who knows.

Offering a religious tract to artist, "Have you been saved?.. "No, I've been spent", said the snarky artist.

"That guy that stole the old lady's tricycle, they should hang him here in the Plaza and have everyone beat him with clubs, and then string his guts in the trees".  A really creepy comment.

Three-year-old boy: Do Santa and Batman fly in the sky together?

Mom: I hope they're careful if they do, because otherwise... Batmobile crashes into Santa's sleigh, boom! (makes explosion noises) Santa and Batman. Dead.
Three-year-old boy: (laughs hysterically)
Auntie: I'm glad he laughed at that, otherwise you were getting the "worst mom" award.

Taxi dispatcher: "Yeah, take your time. No need to kill yourself".

Taxi driver: "One more reason not to kill myself. Copy"

And this below is the final use of this is now officially dead

Loud man on cell, walking across bridge: "So I just said, "I want it all! I want to see it all!"
60-year-old woman to teenage granddaughter: "That's what she said."


  1. Where is Santa? He got mugged on his way here. Mom, How could u say that when a four year old is right here!

  2. Yes , we forgot about that one.